Friday, December 4, 2009

This thing called love...

And no, it isn't what you're thinking.

I'm not talking about "romantic" kissy kissy love...
But rather the love of all things blog related.

Blogging, reading blogs, becoming invested in the lives of people whom I have never met (yet)... googling photos and coming up with blogs I never would have come across if I hadn't first searched for "wildflowers in Uzbecistan", or "grandmas mayo and chili cake".
And getting totally sucked in.

But alas, my love affair has been suffering lately.
Seriously.

Not that it's ever far from my mind, mind you.

See, I can weed and garden til the cows come home, and think up some fantastic blog material.
I can scrub counter tops to rid it of ant footprints and scrape blackened breadcrumbs from the toaster... and whilst doing those boring chores, I can think of wonderful, insightful, earth-shatteringly funny stuff to blog about.

Only I forget it, later.
I sit down, and there's a vast window in my brain, which as soon as my arse hits the chair, the window opens and lets all the good stuff out.
Which leaves me with the boring, spur of the moment, mind-numbingly inane stuff.

It's kind of like opening a telephone directory and letting your fingers do the walking... and just seeing after your fingers have been busy, what you've actually come up with.
Like 'pick a card. Any card'.

Which in my case, is crap.

What I wanted to do with this whole blogging thing, was to get my thoughts and memories down on the proverbial paper as it were... so that my grandsons would some day read through it and think "Wow, Grummie was a hoot and a half in her day, wasn't she?" "Grummie had a great life and some great adventures in her day." "Grummie was cool".

Yep...cool is what I was aiming for.
Sort of.

Because my 3 little guys mean the world to me... and because we're so far apart, it makes it hard to convey to them just exactly "who" this woman called "Grummie" really is.
What made her tick.
Because I didn't want to be simply the giver of gifts and cards and money to these guys. I wanted them to know "me" - like I never got to know my mama or nana's thoughts.
(and besides... whoever knew that I could fall so deeply and irrevocably in love, with 3 little boys that I have only met once in my life for two weeks?)

Unfortunately, they'll probably read it through and think " geez...we should have invested in a home for Grummie a long, long time ago... But who knew that she would have lost her marbles at such an early age?"

But that's not the point. It was supposed to be... but somewhere along the line, other factors came into consideration.

Stuff like friendships formed, and seeds planted.
Ideas for doing this, or cooking or baking that.
Thinking 'I can do that if she can, because she's made it sound so wonderfully inviting that I would be a complete and total idjit if I don't try it too.'

Wondering on any given day what Mary or Sally have been up to, and wondering and waiting for the bits and blobs of their lives to be blogged about.
So that I can laugh or cry, right along with them.
Caring and sharing.
Because I've grown to care.
(Not that there is a real "Mary or Sally"... it's just easier than typing a 101 names, ya know what I mean?)

Because somehow, this has ended up being about you.
Not me.
Your lives.
Your stories.
Your friendships.

So this blogging thing hasn't exactly ended up being the "thing" I was aiming for.
But because of you, (and who knew you were even out there?) it's become so much more.

And I'm grateful to you.

~~~~~
Geez... would ya look at that?
I started off with one thing in mind and ended up going off on a tangent ... completely forgetting where I was heading with this.
What I meant to say was that I have these absolutely terrific ideas for posts - and then I get so side-tracked reading your terrific posts, that I lose track of what I was thinking about posting about.
Because you're far more interesting than me.
And for that... I'm grateful.

Because, if it's true that you're judged by the company you keep, my grandsons will think that I've had a wonderful life.... now won't they?

20 comments:

Pam said...

What a great post. This exactly sums up how I feel about blogging, and reading blogs.

And I also write incredibly witty and entertaining posts in my head all the time, and then sit there staring at my screen when it is time to blog!

Marilyn's Money said...

Kate, I know how the bloggy world is , I'm sucked in to everyones, and read them so much, I feel I have nothing to write. Surely I'm not entertaing as some, but bear with me, I might go off on a tangent someday, but when , how, oh I think now...

Gramma 2 Many said...

I'm thinking we all feel that way sometimes.
BTW, I am not giving up, I am just dry right now. Seems it does not matter what we want or say, they are going to do it their way in spite of us. Besides, it is who I really am.

Homestay Mama said...

Oh, Katie Tatie! That was one of the most beautifully written posts I think I have ever read! You have an amazing gift for writing. I've been envious before, and I'm envious again. ;-) There are a few people, like you, with lots of talent and then there's the rest of us plain Janes.

Sigh.

Hugs from,
Plain Jane

Tatersmama said...

Pam, Hey it's nice to know that I'm not the only one...lol!
~~~~
Marilyn, You? Not entertaining? Pshaw! Then why in the world do I keep coming back, eh? ;-)
~~~~
Gramma 2 Many, I LOVE who you are, and I envy you your ability to stand tall and proud!!!
And NO! We can't let the bastards win!!!
~~~~
Homestay Mama, You're joking...right? I don't see what you see at 'all', but then again, I'm so grateful that I have friends like you, who continue - in spite of my drivel - to inspire and encourage me! ;-)

Roslyn said...

Hmmm is it an age thing ya think this getting sidetracked & forgetting the marvelous wise & witty post you could have written? I know what you mean about cruising the blogs & getting carried away!
Oh yes BTW, the SOB's WILL NOT beat us!

Sooziebelle said...

I love this post. It was worth waiting for. I like that you can talk about not being able to remember all the witty things, because we can probably all certainly relate.

But the real reason why I love this post is that no matter how witty you are, no matter how much you can write things that everyone can relate to, no matter how much of a magnet you are for drawing people in ... the fact is, you are TOTALLY A PEOPLE PERSON and you are always drawn towards other people and their life stories. Big people, little people, it doesn't matter. You are interested in people. I think that makes you very special.

When you look at the big picture, cyberspace is a bit like a quilt, but those wonderful and unique pieces would not stay together without people like you. "People people" like you are the stitching that holds it all together and help to make the whole greater than the sum of its parts.

(man, this is really good wine!).

XOXO

Sherri said...

I'm sure the boy's already think you're a cool Grummie, and I'll bet that when their old enough to read your blog they will find out just how cool and funny you are. My nephews and sister are truely blessed to have you and Josh in their lives. Thank You for being their Grummie

Tatersmama said...

Ros, IS it an age thing, or have we always been scattered like this?
Sometimes I feel like "I coulda been a contender", but then again, in spite of the hardships and set-backs (and heartaches as well... ya know?)life is what it is, and I hope I'm making the best of it. Friends make it easier, but oh, do they get me side-tracked! lol!
~~~~
Sooziebelle, WOW! That is some hack of a wine!!! I want me some!
(and thank you for the kind words... from the bottom of my pea-pickin' little old, sober as a judge, heart!)
xoxox
~~~~~
Sherri, I think it's the other way around, and I'M the one who's been blessed... but Thank You!
And don't forget... I gained you too in the process, so that makes it a double blessing for me!
xoxoxo

Narelle Nettelbeck said...

Hi Katie I've missed seeing you around the place and missed your comments, hope I haven't offended you in some way? Anyway, hope you're well and I know your grandkids must love you lots :)
Thinking about you,
Narelle
xox

HermitJim said...

My friend...I like this post a LOT! You put into words what a lot of us feel every day...

I'm always amazed at the visitors I get some from a long way off! I don't know how they found me, but I'm always thankful that they show up daily!

You just keep up the good work, my friend! I'll keep on dropping by and getting lost...just 'cause it's so pleasant!

Robynn's Ravings said...

I know whatcha mean! I miss seeing you out here but know you're up to other things right now. It's funny....I was just having these thoughts the other night. I was feeling bad about not posting more stories and just talking about stuff and junk in general. But I guess that IS life and the life the kids are a part of.

Can't wait to meet IN PERSON and Amazon says your book will be in sometime the middle of January. What the HECK? That's not a slowboat to China - that's a Chinaman on a floating raft and no oar!

Nancy M. said...

I love all the blogging friends I've met too and love read about them! I think you're way funny! I usually end up leaving here with a smile on my face!

Marjie said...

Your grandsons will think you have a wonderful life. And they'll be happy to know so many of us love you, even at a distance. And we all have dry spells and writers block. Hell, after Thanksgiving, I'm having cooker's block, too!

Joz said...

Kate,
I feel the same way as I have 5 little one's that I am missing out on their lives and I have regrets of not being there.....and this age thing does creep up on you fast, I want these babies to know there is a true person behind all the cards, gifts, money and telephone calls.....
It's incredible with the technology we have today that we can write our hearts out and get things off our chest where ages ago there was nothing like this to turn to, I keep it as good therapy for my own sanity and enjoy it so much,
Hugs
jo

Reddirt Woman said...

Looks like it's time to invest in a small recording device that you can hang around your neck and when the ideas hit push the button and start talking... I also keep a notepad by my chair and on my nightstand to jot down notes. Now I need to get me one of those little recorders. That's not a bad idea if I say so myself.

Helen

Neas Nuttiness said...

Do you know just how wonderful you are? You've blessed my life so much, and I can never thank you enough!!!

Let me know when to pack my bags, cause I'm taking you up on your offer - seriously! How long can I stay?

Lets see:
Crisco
Bacon
Hidden Valley Salad Dressing


Is there anything else you want me to smuggle in?

Sandy said...

You're not alone in your thoughts about blogging. When I'm at work I'm wishing I were blogging, when I do laundry I think, maybe I can do a load then blog for awhile. I love visiting, reading, looking at pics etc. I tell myself, I should do lunch or straighten the house; but here I am...loving it just as you do. Feeling like I do know some of blogging buds as well as some of the people I see face to face.

Enjoyed the post, please swing by for a visit.
Sandy

Bz said...

Don't know what to say other than YOU SAY IT SO WELL.
Hope you are well.

Andrea said...

Such a great post...and so true! You were one of my first blogger friends...and continue to be one of my favourite places to visit. :)


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